"I'M JUST SAYIN"

(MAY)

"I'M JUST SAYIN"

TAKE NO OFFENSE

One of the attributes of God that I love the most is the fact that He sees the end of a thing before the beginning. If we quiet our spirits we can hear from God and follow His lead.

Prior to my birthday celebration I constantly heard in my spirit, "Take No Offense". I had no clue what God was talking about. Since God kept bugging me about "Take No Offense", I looked up the word offense.

of·fense: The act of causing anger, resentment, displeasure, or affront. The state of being offended.

Upon reading this definition I knew immediately what God was saying to me. I know now why God told me to not look back once I entered the sanctuary and took my seat on the front row. Had I not stayed focused on the beauty that was taking place in front of me and looked back, in my humanness, I may have taken offense. Had I looked back I may not have turned into a pillar of salt like Lot's wife, but it could have diminished the beauty that was taking place in front of me.

You can never go wrong with God. The good that happened at my celebration was so profound and magnificent until the little things that could have been an offense didn't even matter. What the enemy meant for evil, God turned into a stepping stone and I came on up a little bit higher. Anyone who did not attend was not there because it was simply not the will of God that they be there. God "weeded out" a lot of excess weight from my life.

I am still floating on a cloud and I don't want to come down. People are still telling me that they smile when they think about the celebration. People are still saying, "It was good to have been there." I can still remember total strangers saying to me that they were so glad that they came and what an honor it was for them to have met me. Total strangers put gifts in my hands.

Just like Solomon, I prayed for God to give me the wisdom to bless His people on My day. Not only did God bless those who attended, He poured out His favor generously upon me. I received gifts that money cannot buy and I literally felt the love in the room. I have never in sixty years of life felt a love like that. I now know what the song writer meant when it was written, "Love Lifted Me".

The one thing that does puzzle me is that I truly believe that had I been laid out in front of the church in a casket, the place would have been packed out. What is it in us as human beings that we would rather celebrate a person after they are dead than to do it while they are alive and can see and feel the love? What is it in us as human beings that find nothing wrong with this picture?

"I'm Just Sayin"

(MARCH)

"I'M JUST SAYIN"

SPIRITUAL THANG

I recently asked God why it is that even though I know He has my back and that He has not brought me this far to leave me, I still find myself fretting, worrying or being anxious from time to time about life and living. I know that the scriptures declare that we should "be anxious for nothing" and to "fret not thyself because of evil doers". I know this to be true, but I seem to forget it way too often.

One day I told God that I was going to need a certain amount of money in about three months. I began to fret, worry and be anxious about where the money was going to come from. God said to me, "How much money do you have today?" I said, "I have more than enough money for today." God said, "So why are you worrying about three months from now?" I said, "Sho you right. Say no more Lord." With just that little conversation with God, the weight of my worries was lifted and I felt like a big dummy for worrying about something that was so far into the future. God has never failed me.

One of my dear Senior Lady friends told me that she doesn't worry about anything at all. I didn't understand at the time how anyone could NEVER worry, fret or be anxious, but I am beginning to understand it now.

The older I get, the closer to God I get. My memory gets a little cloudy sometimes but one thing I always remember is that God don't change. Just as He was with King David, He is the same God who delivers me from my enemies daily. He is the same God who, over thirty years ago, helped me and my son when we were like Hagar and Ishmael alone in the wilderness. He is the same God who has kept me from dangers seen and unseen. He is the same God who quiets my fears and calms the storms in my life. I know all this but I still catch myself worrying, fretting and becoming anxious over things that I have absolutely no control over.

The Bible clearly declares that, "the natural mind cannot comprehend the things of the Spirit, for they are spiritually discerned." In other words, "It's a Spiritual Thang". I was driving myself insane by trying to wrap my natural mind around Spiritual things. It simply cannot be done.

Dear God we know that you are the Same God who has brought us this far. Help our unbelief and increase our faith Oh God. Help us to remember that you are the Same God and that you do not change. Help us Oh God to feed our Spiritual Man all the more so that we can grow to walk in peace, love and prosperity. Help us to remember that we need only a tiny amount of faith and that you will do the rest. Lord teach us daily how to trust and rest in you. In the Name of The Beloved we pray.

"I'm Just Sayin"

"I'M JUST SAYIN"

HATERS GON HATE

I recently read online that Attorney General Eric Holder said, "He still doesn't have any respect for the members of the House of Representatives who pushed to hold him in contempt of Congress". I'm not a "political" person, but I loved Mr. Holder's "in your face" honesty. What primarily got my attention was the lead story line. It read, "Haters Gon Hate".

I once heard it said that, "If Haters didn't hate, they wouldn't have a job." My Aunt Jean use to say, "Talk about me baby cause I needs the publicity." Well alright now!!!

The frustrating thing about Haters is that we can't even hate them back. A Hater is just who they are. They can't help themselves. Can we hate a dog for barking? Can we hate a snake for doing what it's nature tells it to do?

As I look back over my life, I have experienced Haters most of my life. Just like demons, I believe that there are different levels of Haters. New level, new devil/Hater. The GOOD thing about being the object of a Hater's attention is that when the onslaught begins, we can know that a blessing is on the way. The bigger the trial, the bigger the blessing. If we just hold on, trust God and wait, the reward will be great. If we pass the test by not jumping out of the Spirit and taking no offense, God will indeed fight our battles. If we can just remember to overcome evil with good and if we absolutely must respond, that a "soft answer turns away wrath", we will be victorious. I'm a living witness. God did it for me and He will do it for you. Unlike humans, God is not a "respecter of persons".

I heard Bishop T.D. Jakes say that his wife amazes him. He said that he has seen Haters going off right in First Lady Sereta's face and she doesn't say a word. He said that she just looks at them like they're stupid or weird. Bishop Jakes said that he gets more upset about the matter than she does and it's not even his fight. When First Lady Jakes was asked why she seldom responds to the Haters, she simply said in that sweet little voice of hers that "Some things don't require or deserve a response. Sometimes silence is golden." Go head on First Lady!!!

Dear God we know that your Word tells us to "be not weary in well doing". We understand this, but we do get weary Lord. So Father we just ask that when the Haters come, that you to keep our tongues bridled and our tempers on simmer. We also ask that you teach us how to pray for and how to sincerely love our Haters. We ask that you turn our fists into open hands raised in surrender to you. In the name of the one they hated without a cause we pray.

"I'm Just Sayin"

"I'M JUST SAYIN"

THINGS AND STUFF

As I get older, "things and stuff" mean so much less to me. I can remember a time when having a wallet full of credit cards to flash was important to my ego. Now, I have only one charge card that I only use to get the points for free "stuff and things". I can remember having four mink coats at one time. Who does that? I gave one away, sold one and now I want to sell one of the two I have left.

When I downsized from a house to an apartment I had enough "stuff and things" to furnish two apartments and I still had to give away and sell "stuff and things" because I had no place to put them. When I visited my cousin's home in Memphis the first thing I noticed was how much "stuff and things" he and his wife own. They live in a mini mansion and their stuff and things are really nice, but it's still just "stuff and things".

The first time I went to an Estate sale I walked through the sale with amazement and even a sense of reverence. My thought was, "Wow! Look at what happens to all of our stuff and things when we have to move." Total strangers were walking through someone's home and touching their beloved "stuff and things". Stuff and things that it took a lifetime to accumulate.

Anything that I have not worn in five years or more, I give away. As I get older, I find myself feeling a sense of urgency (not panic) to "get my earthly house in order" so that when the time comes for me to leave it all behind, I will be ready. The "stuff and things" that I did keep have very special meaning to me. I recall that when Jacqueline Kennedy Onasis passed away it was said that she did so with the people and "things" around her that she loved. Things like her books and personal pictures.

In a recent episode of one of the Housewives shows one of the filthy rich housewives asked her husband to not buy her "stuff and things" for special occasions. She asked him to write her a love letter instead. She said that whenever she got sad or lonely she would simply read one of her beautiful love letters. I thought that was extraordinarily special. It really is the simple things that make life worth living. Simple things like the joy a sunny day brings, the thrill of hearing the laughter of a child and the ability to move about and to take care of ourselves.

Dear God I thank you for opening my eyes to see what really matters in life. In the Name of The One Who really matters. Amen.

"I'M JUST SAYIN"

THE WILL OF GOD

Lots of times we repeat sayings and quotes because they sound good. In "principal" the sayings are good but they are only as good as they are practiced. Sayings like "It Takes A Village". This is one of my favorite sayings. It took a village when I was growing up and it takes a village today to help raise our children.

It took Mrs. Cook who lived across the street from the house I grew up in. Mrs. Cook invented Neighborhood Watch. It was Mrs. Cook who told my grandparents when I snuck a boy into the house when they were not home. She could see us from behind her curtains but we couldn't see her. It took Mrs. Andrews who lived right next door to us and whose daughter became one of my best friends. Mrs. Andrews taught me how to sew and sometimes she would take me with her family on outings.

All of us over 50 folks remember when a neighbor was allowed to reprimand us and we better hope that our parents didn't find out about it. God forbid acting up in school. OMG!!! This was a direct ticket to a beat down and a lock down on a banana peel. Parents back then didn't play that and we knew it.

I remember a time when we could go to any pastor we knew to help us work out family issues instead of going to a person who knew absolutely nothing about us called a "Mental Health Counselor". This is why I was shocked to find out that some churches and pastors have backed off assisting and intervening regarding family conflicts.

A dear Sister/Friend shared with me that she was having problems communicating with one of her adult children. She deeply loved all of her children and it greatly distressed her that she and this one particular child were now "estranged". My friend went to the adult child's pastor asking for help in resolving whatever the problem was between herself and her child. She knew that her adult child held this Man of God in high esteem, which is why she felt comfortable going to him for advice and counsel. My friend said that she was sobbing and in great distress while telling the Man of God her side of the story. After she dried her eyes and regained her composure, she said that not only did this Man of God not offer her any solution or advice regarding her concerns; he didn't even pray with her. I was THROUGH!!! I was ready to get the tar and feathers and go see this Man of God. As our awesome God would have it, this tragic situation worked out totally for my Sister/Friend's good.

She saw the Man of God about a year after their meeting. It was not until she saw him that she realized that she had not forgiven him for not helping her. She had to admit that she was feeling "some kinda way" about this man and she needed to repent. She immediately went to the Man of God and asked for his forgiveness. Of course he had no idea what she was talking about. She told him that she was angry with him and a lot of other people who did not do anything to cause reconciliation between her child and herself. She came to know that it simply was Not The Will Of God for his man or for anyone else to help her. God wanted her to know in no uncertain terms WHO her help was coming from.

My Muslim and Jehovah's Witness friends have told me that when there is discord in a family and it is reported to them, the men go to see what they can do to bring peace. One Muslim brother told me that when it was reported to them that a husband was repeatedly beating up his Muslim wife, they went to the home and beat HIM up. The husband never laid a hand on his wife again.

I've been a Christian ALL of my life and it never ever crossed my mind to try another faith. However, after hearing stories like these, all I can say is "HMMMMM".

"I'M JUST SAYIN"

(FEBRUARY)

A "KEPT" WOMAN

I recently met a couple who seemed to be around my age. As we began to chat the wife told me how long she and her husband had been married. She also gloated about how her husband "takes really good care of her". When this woman said this I must admit that I felt a tinge of jealousy. Here goes that righteous indignation again. This is what I said to myself. "Humph! I been married four (4) times and had a few "exclusive" relationships and I ain't never been "taken care of". She ain't no cuter or nicer than me."

My Grandmama taught me that if a woman buys herself a pair of stockings, the man ain't taking care of her. I don't completely agree with Grandmama's wisdom on this matter, but I understand where she was coming from.

When another girlfriend told me that she never had a job until she was in her thirties, I wanted to slap her teeth out. I have been working ALL of my life and here this woman is telling me that she has been "taken care of" ALL of her life. As a child I picked a little cotton when I lived in Memphis and made money. As a teenager I ironed clothes for the folks my Grandmama worked for and earned money. As a crazy adult I drove cab (very briefly) and earned money. I have had a LOT of different jobs to earn money all my life.

It was not until God allowed the bottom to fall from my world that I realized that I came to the realization that I had been a "Kept Woman" all of my life. When my world was spinning out of control God "kept" my mind. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but God delivers us out of them ALL. God "kept" his word.

I now wake up every morning with joy in my soul and a song in my heart. God "kept" me all night. I move about in this evil world unharmed. God "kept" me from dangers seen and unseen. I have a warm and comfortable place to live in. God "kept" my rent paid. I have never had a man to buy me a car. God gives me favor with people so that I can earn the money to pay for my car and anything else I need. Not only does God keep His word by supplying all of my needs, He also gives me the desires of my heart.

There is a price, however, to pay for being a "Kept Woman". We have to love the Lord our God with all of our heart, mind and soul. We have to lean on, depend upon and trust God. We have to accept God's challenge to "prove him and see if He won't open up the windows of Heaven and pour us out blessings we won't have room enough to receive." Finally, we must be obedient to God.

I put God to the test a very long time ago and he has never failed me. Just try him.

"I'M JUST SAYIN"

THE FACE OF GOD

          Part of the lyrics of a song titled "Mary Did You Know" got stuck in my spirit. The writer asked Mary if she knew that when she kissed the face of her baby that she was kissing the face of God. These lyrics caused me to wonder, what does the face of God look like? I believe that when I see God in Heaven I will know Him because our Spirits will recognize each other. I wonder what the physical face of God will really looks like.

          Have you noticed that ALL babies are so adorable? Even if the baby is ugly, it's still an adorably ugly baby. This is because all babies are fresh and with no preconceived notions about anyone or anything. Their hearts are pure and their hands are clean. Babies celebrate anyone who will love and care for them.

          God gave me a vision once about faith and babies. In the vision a baby was put on the top of a refrigerator. The parent put out their arms and told the baby to jump. Without hesitation the baby gleefully plunged off the refrigerator into the arms of the waiting parent. For that baby, that parent's smiling face was the face of God.

          Someone recently said something so simple but yet so profound. She said, "God Is Love".  Now I know what the face of God looks like. Among a myriad of other things, the face of God looks like you and I when we show kindness, mercy and love to others. The face of God looks like that group of believers who go to the nursing homes and bring smiles of hope to the hopeless. The face of God is that neighborly nod and smile even though we have no relationship with that person. The face of God is choosing not to destroy our enemy when their very lives are in our very hands.

          I was driving down the street one day and I saw a man pushing a cart filled with bags and rags in the rain. I had a bag of empty bottles and cans in my car that I was going to bless whoever I saw first at the supermarket with. When I saw the man with the shopping cart in the rain, I pulled over, gave him the bag of bottles and a few dollars. As soon as I gave the man the money he immediately raised his hands towards heaven and began to thank and praise God for blessing him in the rain. I saw the face of God in the old man, but the blessing for me is that the old man saw the face of God in me.

CELEBRATION OF LIFE

          I have a beautiful Sister/Friend in the Lord who prays for me constantly and who I know has my back. I have learned that we must be so very careful about whom we accept counsel from. Since my Sister/Friend has a proven track record with me I "usually" accept her advice. There are, however, times when I must respectfully listen to my Sister/Friend's counsel but ultimately do what I know is right for me.

          Recently my Sister/Friend was scolding me because she felt that I was spending too much time planning for death and not living more. I shared with my Sister/Friend how strongly I believe that prearranging your final details is the best thing that a person can do for their family. No, I am not a paid spokes person for any funeral home or cemetery. The fact of the matter is that when we die our families are going to be "tore up from the floor up". Even when a person doesn't have much; death has a way of turning people into "greedy demons". I have seen families fight and fall out over a hair brush. I want to rest in peace knowing that I have personally taken care of what needs to be done pertaining to my personal affects and final arrangements. I am a person who prides herself on having a lot of common sense. My grandmother and dem called it "Mother Wit".

          As the saying goes, there are two things we can be sure of, death and taxes. Whether we want to accept it or not, from the moment we are born we are racing towards death. Our little finite lives are about as long as the dash is between the time of our birth to the time of our death. People are living longer these days but no matter how long we live, we are going to die. Just like we plan and prepare for everything else, we should plan and prepare for our exit from this world.

          If God allows me to live to see it and to be healthy enough, on April 28, 2013 there is going to be a Gospel Musical service in honor of God for allowing me to see SIXTY YEARS (60) of life. The theme for my Celebration of Life is, "Give Me My Flowers". That's right. I want my flowers NOW. Don't celebrate my life when I'm dead, celebrate meNOW while I can appreciate it. Give me my flowers NOW while I can smell them. Millions didn't make it but I was one of the ones who did!

          If you care enough about me to come to my funeral (a long time from now), you need to show up at my Holy Ghost party. When God does call me home (a long time from now), there will be no funeral, no viewing of the body, and no repast. You can come to the burial site, say "Bye Bye" and keep it movin.

          So if waiting to die works better for you to have your life celebrated, that's fine. As for me, I want mine NOW.

"I'M JUST SAYIN"

(JANUARY)

DECEPTION=BETRAYAL

            Recently a long time friend tearfully shared with me that her husband of over thirty years had been caught cheating on her. My friend told me that she had spoken to the "other woman" and that the woman was totally unrepentant. The woman spoke to my friend in a very smug and arrogant manner. Since I ain't totally delivered yet, my first inclination was to ask my friend when she wanted to saddle up and pay Miss Thang a visit. This demon sounded like it needed some blessed oil and hands laid on it. I had the blessed oil and her family was going to do the hands laying.

            As usual, the Holy Ghost snatched me back and said, "Neither of you is going anywhere". Have you noticed that Mama can scream about something forever but Daddy says the same thing one time and EVERYBODY listens? Holy Ghost speaks, I listen. I was reminded that we are New Creatures. We cannot react to life's situations like everybody else does. We are called to be an example. God kept riding me about this and every time God lumped me up, I contacted my girlfriend and lumped her up with the Word from God.

            My friend's husband is a Godly man and truly repentant. He is bending over backwards to reassure my friend that he has learned his lesson. He did not know how much he loved his wife until he almost lost her. This man is committed to do whatever it takes for as long as it takes to win his wife back. You gotta love a guy like that. If he's lying, it will come out, but she has to give him a chance. He has already been beat with many stripes and she doesn't want to run him away with the forever beat down.

            God said that first of all we are putting Miss Thang under the blood of Jesus and leaving her there. God said that a "wise woman builds her house". God said, "It is with love and kindness that I have drawn thee". God said that every time my friend's husband shows her love, she should mirror him and give him double. God did not say it would be easy, but we can do all things through Christ. Let the church say Amen!

            GOD ALSO SAID……the reason why betrayal is able to get a foothold in our marriages is largely due to sin in the camp. That sin is our very own deceptions.

            What I am about to say goes both ways, but as women we seem to think that a little lie is no big deal. We do things behind our partner's backs, keep silent about it ourselves and encourage others to aide and assist in our deceptions. We don't think it's a big deal when we sneak those clothes into the house, are not honest about the finances or when we go to places that we tell our partners we don't go anymore, i.e. (the casino, clubbing, etc.) We are deceptive when we watch that porn behind our partner's back and continue to have those inappropriate communications (text, phone, e-mail, etc.) with others. If we cannot have an open conversation with a person in front of our partners, we should not be having that conversation at all. If a relationship has to be kept a secret then it should not exist. Emotional cheating is very real. This is the true "Gateway" drug.  

            As a photographer for over seventeen years I have interviewed young and old people for wedding photography. During my interviews if only the bride or the groom is with me, they open up to me and share very personal information. Some of that information is about how they intend to keep their finances separate and "private".  It is "the little foxes that destroy the vine". It starts with the finances and adds other things over time.

            God didn't say this. This is just me talking. In my opinion these marriages are doomed before they say "I do". Marriage is a "team" effort. You cannot keep secrets from your teammates and expect to win.

"I'm Just Sayin"

LES MIS

            I recently went to the movies to see Les Miserables. I had absolutely NO idea what to expect from this movie. I didn't even know it was a musical. I had to pay closer attention to what was being said in this movie because they were singing instead of talking. The scenery and cinematography were fabulous and the story line was wonderful. I had no idea that this movie had a "spiritual" message. It was a story of forgiveness and redemption.

            The movie showed how love and forgiveness can literally transform a person's life. When one person was shown kindness and mercy, he passed that lesson on by doing the same thing for another person. Even though he was being unjustly hunted down like a dog and caused great pain and anguish, he did not kill his enemy when he had the opportunity to do so. His enemy killed himself. I think this happened because he refused to change.

            I was recently placed in a similar situation as the "forgiving" characters in the movie. Someone's livelihood and career were literally placed in my hands. This is a person who took great joy in trying to cause misery in my life. Among other things, this person has caused me to lose money. It's not the money it's the "principal". To add insult to injury, this person has been extremely arrogant and gleeful about having the opportunity to cause me unnecessary grief. This was all done under the guise of "I'm just doing my job." While the enemy rejoiced and danced with glee, I have remained silent.

            WELL, as God would have it, a very short time after this person did their dastardly deeds and walked around looking all smug, God delivered them right into my hands. NOW!!!!! The sword has been turned!!!!! What shall I do? I know that vengeance is yours God, but this person "deserves" to feel my wrath.

             The Holy Spirit took me to the scriptures where King Saul was trying to kill David for no reason other than jealousy and fear. WELL, as God would have it, David was put in a position where he could have literally taken the life of the King but did not do so.

            As I pondered this life lesson I decided that just like the "forgiving" characters in Les Mis and just like King David, I am going to take the high road and allow the offender to live. I was looking forward to telling this person to update their resume. I was looking forward to the neighbors being happy that this person was gone from amongst us. I was looking forward to getting rid of this thorn in our flesh. God reminded me to think about where we ALL would be if we got what we "deserved". Vengeance is truly God's and He WILL repay. Now I understand all the more why we are instructed to pray for our enemies.

            I thank God for giving me a forgiving heart and the ability to show mercy to someone else, just like He showed mercy and forgiveness to me. I pray that all of my enemies will have their black hearts turned into a red one covered in the Blood of Jesus. In The Name of the Beloved.  

"I'm Just Sayin"

HE HEARS ME

1/14

          About 4:00 p.m. one day a car that was parked in the Visitor's parking lot where I live began experiencing problems with its alarm system. Every twenty minutes or so the car alarm would go off. I watched out of my window as the apartment complex security guard walk over to the car, look at it and walk away. This car alarm went off ALL NIGHT every twenty minutes. I know because I timed it before I finally fell asleep. At 4:00 a.m. I awoke to the sound of the car alarm still going off. I am always awake and up spending time with God between 4:00 a.m. and 5:00 a.m., so waking up that early did not annoy me. What did annoy me was that gosh darn car alarm was still going off.

            I was getting angrier by the second. I could not believe that this car alarm was STILL going off and nobody was doing anything about it. I made up in my mind that the very next time that alarm went off I was going to go downstairs in my nightgown, write down the license plate number and call the police. While I was on the telephone with the police and writing down the license plate number, the car alarm started going off again. The alarm was so loud until I had to move away from it to continue talking to the police.

            I called housing security and asked what was going to be done about the car alarm. The security guard told me that there was nothing that they could do about it because they did not know who the car belonged to. The security guard only angered me more by saying something stupid like, "It must be a guest cause it's parked in the visitor parking lot. Yall need to stop having guests." Instead of me taking the high road, I said to the security guard, "I bet if I threw a brick through the window something would be done about it." Stupid responded by saying, "Yeah. I guess something would be done." I just hung up the phone.

            After hanging up the telephone on the useless security guard, I began cursing the car. I literally said to the car, "I curse the day you were made!" Suddenly, like a bolt of lightning and out of nowhere, it came to me. I needed to pray. I said, "Father, will you please kill this car?" I said, "Please make the battery die. In Jesus Name." After I prayed that prayer, I waited to see what God was going to do. I had to chase doubt away a few times so that I could persist in my faith.

            When I prayed that prayer, it was 5:15 a.m. I had made up in my mind that if the alarm did not go off again by 6:00 a.m., God had killed the car. At 5:45 a.m., just as I was looking out my window another car pulled beside the car with the alarm problem. Someone got out of the car that had just pulled up, got into the car with the alarm problem and drove off. Now if you aren't shouting by now you need to check your Holy Ghost meter. This is what TRUE SHOCK AND AWE is all about. My natural mind could not begin to comprehend the awesomeness of a Holy God paying attention to a wretch like me. I wanted to do the Happy Dance and fall prostate on the floor.

            Thank you Father for hearing me in my time of distress and trouble. Thank you for always coming to my rescue and loving me through my good and my bad. Thank you for showing and reminding me that I don't have to allow anything or anyone to take my peace. Thank you for always inclining your ear to my cry. In Jesus Name.

"I'm Just Sayin"

"I'M JUST SAYIN"

GENERATIONAL CURSE

                      I use to think that whenever someone referred back to their childhood to explain why they were deficient in some area of their lives was nothing more than a cop-out and an excuse. As I said, I "use" to think that way. I thought that way until I thought about my own bad behavior. I use to think that my language was foul most of the time because I was an "Angry Black Woman". As I contemplated this "Angry Black Woman" syndrome, it occurred to me that I was using that as a cop-out and excuse for my bad language.

          I like keeping it real, so I had to keep it real with myself first. It occurred to me that I didn't just cuss when I was angry, I cussed ALL the time. Cussing was just like saying Good Morning. I cussed because I come from a Cussin family. My grandparents (especially my grandmother) cussed. My aunts and uncles cussed. All their friends and acquaintances cussed. Therefore, I cussed. I am writing this in past tense because I am being delivered all the more from the Cussin Generational curse every second.

          I remember years ago my good friend Vicki said to me, "Girl you can really cuss". She said, "You cuss like my husband. All gritty nasty". Much to my shame, at the time she said that I was Saved, Sanctified, Holy Ghost filled and Fire Baptized. I was speaking in tongues, passing out Gospel tracks and telling everybody about the love of Jesus. I gave generously to my church and even sang Gospel songs in public. But I still cussed. Sweet water and bitter water flowing from the same fountain? Hmmmm.

          What I find to be most interesting about this Cussin Demon is that it knows "when to" come out and "when not to" come out. It's not like I did not have any control over it. When I was in the presence of certain people I NEVER cussed. I may have let a little one fly for effect, but I basically had that demon under control. I just cussed because I could and it felt perfectly normal to me.

           Back in the 70s I turned my tape recorder on. As the recorder was going someone knocked at my door. I completely forgot that the tape recorder was still running. When my guest left, I rewound the tape only to hear myself talking. How I sounded shocked me, but I had no relationship with God, so I continued to cuss.

          It has been said that during biblical times the Jews wore the scriptures tied around their heads and wrists. This was done so that you and whoever was coming towards you would be constantly reminded of the Word of God. You don't have to wear the scripture tied around your heads, but please do me a favor by not only praying for my continued deliverance, and that this generational curse be destroyed, but when you see me please feel free to say, "NO CUSSIN DOROTHY". In His name.

"I'm Just Sayin"

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